dear paul,

forgive me please,if i get a little distant at times. its my insecurities that leave me feeling lonesome. i want to give all my trust to you...

oh shit oh shit oh shit

please,PLEASE God,do not let me ruin this.

this is something i had wanted,and yet i woke up feeling nothing.

fuck you,dm!

m:"when i heard your voice,it sounded like someone died."
s:"someone did....me."


I am completely devoid of emotion,i can only blame myself. Something you said in passing broke me between the sheets, back when I gave my love away like some sort of pseudo-insurance. It feels like my bones are hollow and affection only makes me sink deeper into my own skin. I know that these are defenses;you called me compassionless. we have that thing in common. i suppose we'll keep breaking each other's hearts until we can feel our own.

she hates everybody

sigh,

-"i told you not to fall in love with me"


-"and i told you i wouldn't be able to help it. its your fault."

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

october 4th,2006
april 18th,2008
june 20th,2008
may 30th,2009
october 29th,2009
december 26th,2009


dates i'd like to forget.

you just see the good.

i'm not so sure you can handle the bad.

can't catch a damn break

ever get that moment where everything seems perfect,and then one thing makes it come crashing down? is that bad of me,that i find deal breakers in situtations,that i find that something that crosses the boundary between perfect and dismal? i don't know what to think,i feel at times i'm being too severe,and others too lenient. god damn,i just want some balance and stability,thats all i ask,please?

3/10/2010
10:08 PM Paul:
You are amazing<3
……………………………………………………………………
10:09 PM estefania:
<3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
……………………………………………………………………
10:10 PM Paul:
You are gorgeous<3
……………………………………………………………………
10:11 PM Paul:
You are MIIIIIIINE!

i meant what i said,

and i'm not taking it back !

i can't let it out

i still want you in.

tall enough

Where is the person who has your heart?

jeez i don't even know where my heart is these days.