eyedeekay

everything about you continues to invade my every thought.
it keeps me from having a healthy relationship & leading a normal life.
i hate you.

i am counting down the days until i leave. everyone makes this whole scene about how far away i'm going and blah blah stay in touch blah blah,when let's face it,you could give a shit less about me,and i give a shit less about you.
you gave my cold heart that warm touch.♥
"Enough about my beauty.” Buttercup said. “Everybody always talks about how beautiful I am. I’ve got a mind, Westley. Talk about that."
...control
self control.
it takes everything in me not to have my words spill out like vomit on the sidewalk.

question: open myself up and sound melodramatic & attention seeking,or drown in my own thoughts??

i just don't know anymore.
estefania equals miscellaneous.
"I'm too shallow. And too picky. Sometimes i miss a good thing when its right in front of me."
i miss seeing your beat up bike on my porch. i miss the 2am phone calls asking if i was awake. i miss the three hour converations about life. i miss laughing at your ear. i miss seeing you on my couch. i miss the random knocking on my window asking for food. i miss my best friend...but you're there,& i'm here,and that's all there really is to it.
my eyes miss your face.
my heart misses your heart.
my soul misses your love...

i hate when i come across your picture,because it makes me miss a friendship that is old and no good for me. I wish there was a way for me to hate you.

dear paul,

forgive me please,if i get a little distant at times. its my insecurities that leave me feeling lonesome. i want to give all my trust to you...

oh shit oh shit oh shit

please,PLEASE God,do not let me ruin this.
this is something i had wanted,and yet i woke up feeling nothing.